A recent ankle sprain has me working hard at speeding up my healing.
I’m told “Four to six weeks – at least – before I can begin to think about doing my regular activities.” Forget about it! One, two weeks tops! The brace? The ice? Don’t really need ’em . I can heal better and faster than any statistic. I’m a good healer!
This experience has given me the opportunity to notice my desire to speed up my healing, to put it on a timeline of my choice. A couple of observations:
Our language around healing implies there is both timing and an ending to our healing.
“You’ll be healthy in no time!”
“You’ve been sick/grieving/grumpy/sad for long enough now.” Likely followed by a “Get over it.”
Our many and varied health practitioners frequently give us timelines.
“Give it a week and you should be back to normal.”
Or they offer solutions that imply I can speed up, or at least control my healing.
If I eat the right thing…
If I do the right exercise…
If I take a pill…
If I get a good night’s sleep…
If I meditate…
If I follow these 3 easy steps, I’ll be better in no time.
Many of our policies incorporate timeline and endings as well.
Three days of bereavement leave. Two weeks of sick leave. Six months of extended disability leave.
These messages have us believing we can speed up our healing, that we can, at the very least, control it and make it happen to a certain prescribed time window.
The more work I do facilitating bereavement groups, the more I appreciate that the journey of grief – also a healing journey of sorts – takes as long as it takes. One thing I know for sure – we do not “get over” or “get through” a significant loss in 3 days. Each individual is different. Each circumstance is different. Each set of losses is different. The accompanying journey and its timing is different.
How long does it take to get over someone? (If we ever actually “get over”….)
How long does it take to make a career change?
How long does the process of cancer, spinal fusion surgery, or depression take?
Here’s where I’ve landed as I’ve explored my push to heal faster…
My ankle is going to take as long as it takes. I believe my actions have the capacity to slow down my healing, but I’m realizing they can’t speed up my healing.
I don’t think we have the power to speed up healing – your body , mind, and spirit have their own timelines . Those timelines could entail minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, years, or a lifetime!
I do however believe we have the power to enhance our healing.
For example our reflective practices, exercise, living life on purpose, being vulnerable, stepping into rather than away from our emotions – all of these have the potential to encourage and enliven our healing. This is in no way an exhaustive list – you have your own practices and approaches. Those may include medications, doctors, counselors, coaches, intuitive readers, or not. They may include eating certain types of food or not. Whatever your practices, I don’t believe we can control our healing, but I do believe our actions/choices can be in service of it. Perhaps a subtle, but I believe significant distinction.
Your invitation – to step into life changes, growth, and healing without strict timelines. It is not about speed. It is about being human. It is about allowing.
What if we could gracefully give ourselves the time needed for the “stuff” of life?
